What to do when you don't know what to do

The next couple of weeks are transition for most small groups.

Review how things have been going in the group. Take some feedback on what people like, don’t like, ect.

You should probably discuss the next Bible Study material you are going to use and how that is going to work. You could answer some questions together like:

• How many weeks will it last?
• Who will facilitate discussion?
• How will you structure each meeting?
  
  You might want to have a time of
• extended fellowship this week or
• spend some extra time in prayer for one another.
  
  This might also be a good time to get the group brainstorming about outreach.
  
  Also, you could have people review where they have been this past year (spiritually, emotionally, physically) and where they hope to be in the coming year. What areas do they want to grow in? etc.

What to do this week?

No church this past weekend b/c of snow; I have only seen this a handful of times.

Now what? What are the small groups going to do since there is no sermon/scriptures to talk about this week. Well, some of the groups are probably taking a holiday break from small group meetings, but if you are still meeting perhaps you could go back to the last two group meeting notes and revisit some questions that you didn't get to.

http://ccclifegroups.blogspot.com/2007/12/finding-god-in-unexpected-places-abram.html

http://ccclifegroups.blogspot.com/2007/12/finding-god-in-unexpected-places-abram_10.html

On Christmas Eve at 8pm, I will be speaking on the subject:

"Spiritual GPS: Finding Jesus in this dark and hostile world."

Hope you can make it.

Thanks for all that you are doing to shepherd people here at Crossroads.

Vinnie C.

Finding God in Unexpected Places: Abram part 2

Week Eleven: Finding God in Unexpected Places
Abraham Part Two

You should be starting your meeting close to the stated time. There is only 90 minutes in this outline; if you don’t start on time, the group will be short changed some where. People like to chat in the beginning and that is fine. That is one of the purposes of the Connection Portion. Get them talking toward the goal of fellowship and connection toward a purpose. They can socialize after the meeting.

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Can you think of a time recently (or in the past) where God clearly spoke or impressed something on you (like He did Abraham in Gen. 15)?

or you could do something lighter like

Tell us about one of your family’s Christmas traditions.

Topic of Sunday’s talk: God spoke to Abraham through a familiar custom (cutting a covenant). God answered much bigger questions than Abraham was asking. God spoke to Abraham through thick and dreadful darkness. God gives us faith to overcome our weakness and obstacles. Genesis 15:4--21

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Bruce said that Genesis 15:4-21 could be seen as a prayer. Read it again and discuss what you might learn about prayer from this passage and then pray together.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

In Genesis 15:2, Abram asks God, “What can you do for me?” Is there a particular need that you are bringing to God this week?

God answered Abram’s question with a much bigger answer. What do you suppose might happen if you began to see God’s BIG PICTURE plans for your life?

Why does God, at times, seem to withhold His power from us? (Bruce’s answer: Belief. If God did everything for us right away, we would never exercise our faith muscles).

Respond to this statement, God does His best work through “thick and dreadful darkness.”




Read 2 Corinthians 12:9

If God’s power is made perfect in weakness & brokenness, what does that say about how we ought to view weakness in ourselves and others?

How can we become more comfortable sharing our weakness with one another?

Bonus: God is the initiator of the covenant, the one who carries it forward, and the one who pays the price. What does that mean to you?

Develop: 8:00-8:15

This is a good time to get feedback on how the group is being experienced by each person. Open up a discussion and make sure people feel safe sharing their thoughts. Don’t allow debate on issues, just a chance for people to speak their minds. Hopefully you will learn something and make changes to the group accordingly

Talk about how to handle the holiday season in terms of when and where the group will or will not be meeting. If taking a break, schedule a date to begin again in January.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Wednesday Salvation Army outreach 12/12 at 5pm downtown Framingham

If you want, show your group the $100 check from the church toward a creative or simple outreach plan into which the Lord may lead you.

Finding God in Unexpected Places: Abram

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Share an experience when you found God in any unexpected place or situation.

True Example: Someone defrauded me out of a large sum of money. Reflecting back on the experience years later, God allowed me to see that He had returned that money to me in His own time and in His own way. I found God through a thief.

Topic of Sunday’s talk: We often find God in unexpected places. Abram waited years to have a son with Sarah who was well beyond child bearing years. God’s promise for a son wasn’t fulfilled right away. There was a long period of silence; Abram and Sarah tried to fulfill God’s promise without Him. Genesis 15:1-5

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Are there any situations in your life right now that seem impossible to you or a situation in which you are waiting on God to fulfill a promise?

Read Genesis 15:1-2

Reflect on what it means that God can be your shield.

Reflect on what it means that God can be your great reward.

Pray and surrender yourselves to God knowing He is a shield and a great reward for you.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

Read Genesis 14:18-20

 Abram rescued his nephew Lot and the people of Sodom (Genesis 14) in a military victory. After this God spoke to Abram, “Do not be afraid, Abram, I am your shield.” Genesis 15:1

What do you suppose that meant to Abram at that time?

What does it mean to you that God could be a shield to you?

Read Genesis 14:20-24

 After having refused to take rewards from the battle, what do you think it meant to Abram when God said, “I am your very great reward?”

What does it mean to you that God could be a great reward to you?

Read Genesis 15:2 “What can you give me?” (Abram’s first words after hearing that God could be a great reward to Him).

 What does it say about us that we can’t be content with God as a reward?

Have you ever been in that place where God’s blessings (what you can get from Him) are more important to you than just having and being with Him?

How did you work through this?

 Referencing Abrams waiting for God to fulfill His promise of a son, Bruce said something like, “Does your Theology leave room for periods of silence from God?” Discuss this concept and its implications for our faithwalk.

 Abram and Sarai tried to preempt God’s plan by having Abram sleep with Sarai’s servant.

Talk about our tendency to “take matters into our own hands” while we are supposed to be waiting on God.

Bonus: In Daniel 10, Daniel’s answer to prayer was hindered by a battle in the unseen world. Could it be that God has answered a prayer of ours but that it is being delayed b/c of a spiritual battle behind the scenes?

Develop: 8:00-8:15

This is a good time to get feedback on how the group is being experienced by each person. Open up a discussion and make sure people feel safe sharing their thoughts. Don’t allow debate on issues, just a chance for people to speak their minds.

Talk about how to handle the holiday season in terms of when and where the group will or will not be meeting. If taking a break, schedule a date to begin again in January.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Next Salvation Army outreach 12/12 at 5pm downtown Framingham

Counter Coal-ture

God is love. Even His wrath is meant to bring us to repentance.

Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." Romans 12:19-21

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Tell about a time (humorous or serious) when you wanted to seek revenge against another.

Topic of Sunday’s talk: Christ followers ought to live counter culturally not seeking revenge so as to leave room for God’s work in other people’s lives. Leaving room for God’s wrath, often will result in repentance on the other person’s part.

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Here is a great psalm to have the group read aloud. Ask group members to bring to mind someone with whom they are having a difficult time.

If God could see into our hearts, what would he see concerning that person?

Ask group members to latch onto a phrase and use it as a guide to prayer after the psalm is done being read.

Psalm 94

1 O LORD, the God who avenges,
O God who avenges, shine forth.
2 Rise up, O Judge of the earth;
pay back to the proud what they deserve.
3 How long will the wicked, O LORD,
how long will the wicked be jubilant?
4 They pour out arrogant words;
all the evildoers are full of boasting.
5 They crush your people, O LORD;
they oppress your inheritance.
6 They slay the widow and the alien;
they murder the fatherless.
7 They say, "The LORD does not see;
the God of Jacob pays no heed."
8 Take heed, you senseless ones among the people; you fools, when will you become wise?
9 Does he who implanted the ear not hear?
Does he who formed the eye not see?
10 Does he who disciplines nations not punish?
Does he who teaches man lack knowledge?
11 The LORD knows the thoughts of man;
he knows that they are futile.
12 Blessed is the man you discipline, O LORD,
the man you teach from your law;
13 you grant him relief from days of trouble,
till a pit is dug for the wicked.
14 For the LORD will not reject his people;
he will never forsake his inheritance.
15 Judgment will again be founded on righteousness, and all the upright in heart will follow it.
16 Who will rise up for me against the wicked?
Who will take a stand for me against evildoers?
17 Unless the LORD had given me help,
I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. 18 When I said, "My foot is slipping,"
your love, O LORD, supported me.
19 When anxiety was great within me,
your consolation brought joy to my soul.
20 Can a corrupt throne be allied with you—
one that brings on misery by its decrees?
21 They band together against the righteous
and condemn the innocent to death.
22 But the LORD has become my fortress,
and my God the rock in whom I take refuge.
23 He will repay them for their sins
and destroy them for their wickedness;
the LORD our God will destroy them.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

Discuss this comment: “Planting the seed of revenge results in a root of bitterness.” (And we all know how difficult it is to remove weeds down to the root level).

Are you playing any figurative audio or video from fractured relationships that might be fostering a spirit of revenge inside of you?

Looking at relational difficulties through a short-term lens can cause us to seek revenge to get immediate results and change the situation. The longer-term view of eternity that God has allows Him to be more patient with people. Are you seeing this longer term view? Are you becoming more patient or less patient with people who wrong you?

Remember, God is still working on you. You are not completely mature yet and neither are the people around you. Any response to that comment?

Sometimes we try to play God in other people’s lives. How well are you doing recognizing what your role is in other’s lives and what God’s role is in other’s lives?

Read Romans 12:19-21
What ways have you found to “leave room for God’s wrath” when you are upset with someone?

In the past how have you interpreted the phrase, “heap burning coals on his head?”

Are you satisfied with the suggestion that this might have been a reference to a common repentance practice in the Egyptian culture of that day?

What other ways could this be interpreted?

Someone in my group suggested that when we treat others well when they treat us poorly, our good works will “burn on their conscience” and convict them of sin.

Develop: 8:00-8:15

This Friday night at 5 pm we organize a meal for over 100 at the Salvation Army in downtown Framingham.

Would your group like to help serve the meal or help cook? Call Kathy at 508.740.8153.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Is there someone outside of God’s family with whom you have sought revenge?

Pray for these people to come to Christ.

Has your group narrowed down an activity for outreach? Who, what, where, when, why? Let me know about your idea!

This Sunday, December 2nd is a small group leader get-to-gether from 1:30-3:00 at the church. Grab a quick bite to eat at a local restaurant while I lead my small group from 12:30-1:30.

Here is a resource you might find helpful. I have always enjoyed this publisher's products (David C. Cook).

Everyone & Everybody

Week Eight: ”Everyone & Everybody”

Connect: 7:00-7:20

These next two questions could take over the entire night, so keep people focused. Remind people that the connection time is not for us to get off on tangents. Make sure this doesn’t turn into a debate about the issues that are brought up. People can do that on their own time (don’t let them use the group for this purpose).

Can you think of a secondary issue in Christianity that had you all worked up, but about which you have since become more leveled-headed? (example: Which bible version, birth control, politics, music, etc).

If not, finish this sentence, “I don’t understand why some Christians get all worked up about…”
(Again, do not allow the group to debate the issues. That isn’t the purpose here).

Topic of Sunday’s talk: People ought to be able to see that we live in an honorable way; we ought to do all we can to live at peace with everyone.

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

It is so easy to allow secondary issues to take our time and attention off of the main issues (loving God and loving others).

Are there any secondary issues that have sidetracked you in the past month?

Let’s surrender these to God tonight.

Philippians 3:10
I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death,

To keep first things first, we need to know the God of the Bible. Pray that secondary issues would not dominate our lives. Pray that God would reveal Himself to us so that we can discern between first things and second things.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

What an amazing opportunity to focus the group’s attention on such a critical issue like primary issues and secondary issues. This may not be a “fun” conversation, but a much needed one. Please don’t shy away from asking these questions. People need the chance to give each other feedback on how they are experiencing the group.

§ “God has not made you the spiritual police for everyone around you.” What do you think about that comment?

§ As a group, have we ever fallen into this trap with one another?

Has anyone in the group ever felt like they were being spiritually apprehended (arrested) by someone else in the group? Be honest! What can we learn from this?

What are the best ways for us to ensure that people in our group don’t feel we are trying to be their policeman?

Has our group ever been sidetracked by secondary issues that are not all that important to our own spiritual lives?

How can we ensure that we don’t get sidetracked with secondary issues on a regular basis?

§ Read 1 Peter 2:12.

What would it look like for us to live this out this week?

What obstacles might we face in living this out?

§ If there is time, you could open up Romans 14 (maybe start with verses 1-4) and spend some time discussing its relevance to particular situations people are facing right now.

§ Bottom line question: “Are you doing everything you can to live at peace with both the believers and unbelievers in your life?”

Develop: 8:00-8:15

Is there anyone in particular that the group should spend some time ministering to tonight? What shape should that ministry take? (prayer, listening to them, affirming them, etc.)

Missonaries (Mutti, Forsens) still available for adopting.

Discuss group intensions for the future (curriculum or sermon based discussions).

Share: 8:15-8:30

Is there someone outside of God’s family with whom you would like to live at peace?

Pray for these people to come to Christ.

Has your group narrowed down an activity for outreach? Who, what, where, when, why? Let me know about your idea!

Reminder: Sunday, December 2nd is a small group leader get-to-gether from 1:30-3:00 at the church.

Listen to the message: "Everyone and Everybody"

As If it Were Me

Week Seven

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Can you remember a time when you were able to walk in someone else’s shoes and enter into their experience of joy, sadness, or anger?

If not, can you remember a time recently when you watched someone else do this?

Topic of Sunday’s talk: Entering into someone else’s experience the way you wish others would do for you. Empathy was the key word. This is identifying with someone even to the point of responding physically. The Key scripture phrase was “rejoicing with those who rejoice and mourning with those who mourn.” (Rom. 12:15)



Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Read Luke 10:25-37. Before you do, ask the group to join you in a prayer method called Lectio Divina. It consists in listening to the texts of the Bible (Luke 10:25-37 in this case) as if one were in conversation with God and he was suggesting the topics for discussion.

25 On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he asked, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" 26 "What is written in the Law?" he replied. "How do you read it?" 27 He answered: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" 28 "You have answered correctly," Jesus replied. "Do this and you will live." 29 But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?" 30 In reply Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31 A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33 But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34 He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him. 35 The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. 'Look after him,' he said, 'and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.' 36 "Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?" 37 The expert in the law replied, "The one who had mercy on him." Jesus told him, "Go and do likewise."

Surrender yourselves to God to live the kind of life that responds to needs the way that the “Good Samaritan” did.



Grow: 7:30-8:00

The Priest crossed over to the other side.

The Levite/Temple assistant took a closer look and then passed by the other side.

Do you find yourself having these kinds of reactions to those in pain?

Why do you think that is?

Are you having these type of reactions to those who are rejoicing and celebrating accomplishments (promotion, financial gains, new car, new house)?

Why do you think that is?

Is it easier for you to weep with those who are weeping or rejoice with those who are rejoicing? Why do you think that is?

What is your reaction to the statement: “Even Jesus asked ‘Why’?” (“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”). Does this indicate that there should be a fair dose of mystery that surrounds pain and suffering?

Are you becoming more or less aware of the mysteries that surround our faith?

§Read Hebrews 2:14-18

What does it mean to you that Jesus suffered and was tempted in all points like we are?

What does it mean to you that b/c Jesus experienced everything that we do, He is able to help us?

Bruce said that empathy is something that is best practiced within a small group of people.

PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTIONS ARE…

§ How can this group learn to rejoice with one another better? (ie. celebrate birthdays, milestones, etc.).

§ How can this group learn to mourn with one another better?


Develop: 8:00-8:15

Missonaries (Mutti, Forsens) still available for adopting.

Discuss group intensions (curriculum or sermon based discussions).

Sharing group responsibilities
Leading discussions
Prayer time
Calling absentees
Keeping group roster
Maintain a list of serving opportunities
Organizing group outreach
Hosting group
Becoming an apprentice
Leading worship time
Writing notes and cards
Visiting needy/sick on group roster
Maintaining calendar and schedules
Keeping list of birthdays/anniversaries
Providing feedback/evaluation

Do you want to ask for help in any of these areas?


Share: 8:15-8:30

Has your group narrowed down an activity for outreach?

Is there someone far from God that we can reach out to by rejoicing with them in their current joy?

Is there someone far from God that we can mourn with?

Pray and ask God for wisdom on this.

Reminder: Sunday, December 2nd is a small group leader get-to-gether from 1:30-3:00 at the church.

Blessing and Cursing

Week Six: Blessing and Cursing

Topic of Sunday’s talk: Blessing others and not cursing them. We receive blessing from God and, like a mirror, we reflect it back to him and out to others. Our words can bless others and our lives can bless others.

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Tell about a time when someone blessed you (ascribed to you good things to you)? What impact did it make?

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Take a moment to pray/praise God for those just mentioned who have blessed you in various ways.

Read this old Hymn as a prayer (you could pass out a verse to each person).

How I praise Thee, precious Saviour
That Thy love laid hold of me!
Thou hast saved and cleansed and filled me
That I might Thy channel be.

Chorus:
Channels only blessed Master,
But with all Thy wondrous power
Flowing through us. Thou canst use us
Every day and every hour.
Emptied that Thou shouldest fill us,
As clean vessels in Thy hand;
With no power but as Thou givest
Graciously with each command.
Chorus

Witnessing Thy power to save us,
Setting free from self and sin;
Thou who boughtest to possess us,
In Thy fullness, Lord, come in!
Chorus

Jesus, fill now with Thy Spirit
Hearts that full surrender know
That the streams of living water:
From our inner selves may flow!
Chorus

Amen

Grow: 7:30-8:00

Here are a bunch of ideas I have for questions that could be asked this week. Choose the ones that will work best for your group.

The most important question is, “How can I be a blessing (channel, conduit) to others?”

How does your spiritual giftedness impact the way that you live out being a blessing to others?

Have you found ways to bless others at…

Work? Home?, somewhere else?

Does a mirror accurately depict the way that we receive blessing from God and then reflect back onto Him? Prove this with scripture.

Is it true that you can’t give blessings from God to others if you are not regularly receiving blessings from God?

What would help you recognize and receive God’s blessing more regularly?

What does the imagery of a channel of blessing bring to your mind?

To “channel” God’s blessings, we must be in tune with others and the Holy Spirit. Which one is easier/harder for you?

Blessed are those who are persecuted. If some one is persecuting you, you should bless them b/c by their persecution they have helped to elevate you to a blessed status. What do you think of that?

What could our group do to be a blessing to each other and a blessing to others this week?

Develop: 8:00-8:15

Does the group want to adopt a church missionary (Forsens, Muttis, other)?

Does the group want to continue focusing on the sermon scriptures each week or branch out into something different?

Blessing Chair: place someone/some ones in a chair in the middle of the room. Ask them how you could bless them through prayer. Pray for God’s blessing on their life. This is one way to have the group exercise blessing others.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Group Outreach Project

Last week I offered instructions for a brainstorming session on outreach. If you haven’t done that yet, go back and look it over

http://ccclifegroups.blogspot.com/2007/10/quitting-is-not-option.html

If you did the brainstorming session, it might be time to evaluate your ideas. Have the group narrow it down to the top couple ideas and then start doing pros and cons for each. Ask who is wiling to help with the various aspects of the outreach. If no one is willing to take on parts of it, scratch that idea and move to the next one.

Let me know what you come up with. If your idea requires money, let me know.

Reminder: Sunday, December 2nd is a small group leader get-to-gether from 1:30-3:00 at the church.

Thanks for your labor of love,

Vinnie C.

Quitting is not an option

Week Five: Quitting is not an option

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Are you a natural optimist or pessimist? Why?

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Topic of Sunday’s talk: not quitting. Let us pray for perseverance. One way to stretch ourselves in worship is to read prayers that others have written and use them as our own or use them as a springboard for our own prayer.

Prayer for Perseverance
Lord,let Thy wisdom melt into my heart...And give me courage to be always true...Teach me to be sincere in what I do...And keep the honor of my daily art...Show me the way to make another start... Where life is young and melodies are
new... Where goodness grows and jealousies are few... And perseverance plays a noble part... For that is all that I would have today...To take the proper path and and persevere... And be un-
noticed all along the way... Until the end of everything is near ...And then, before I go, to hear them say... This life was like a prayer from year to year. James J. Metcalfe

Does anyone in the group need special prayer for perseverance?

Grow: 7:30-8:00

Romans 12:11
Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.

How much does the world’s motto “If it doesn’t work for you, dump it” affect us as Christians?

Bruce brought up the phrase “One eye on the EXIT sign.” Does this describe how to approach certain aspects of your life?

The distinguishing mark of saving faith is not perfection. The mark of faith is not that I never sin…The mark of faith is that I fight. I fight anything that dims my sight of Jesus as my glorious Savior. I fight anything that diminishes the fullness of the lordship of Jesus in my life. I fight anything that threatens to replace Jesus as the supreme Treasure of my life. Anything that stands between me and receiving Jesus. Faith fights -- not with fists or knives or guns or bombs, but with the truth of Christ. John Piper

What biblical material supports this idea of the Christian life being a fight?

The illustration for fervor was a “slow boil.”

How is that apt word picture?

What helps you keep your spiritual fervor?

What situation these days is trying your ability to persevere?

Spiritually speaking, what discourages you the most so that you consider quitting?

You could also take a look at

Ephesians 6 where it talks about putting on the whole armor of God.
Galatians 6 where it talks about reaping a harvest if you don’t quit.
James 1:4 where it talks about letting patience have its way with us so that we might be fully mature.

You could pray for any issues that arose during discussion.

Develop: 8:00-8:15

Since we don’t have a mission team at the church, I wonder if your small group would be interested in ministering to a missionary family. The Forsens and Muttis have both ministered here in our church recently. Would your group be interested in making a connection either of them? Ideas: pray for them, write them, visit them on the field, etc.

What is the next step for your group? Does the group want to continue focusing on the sermon scriptures each week or branch out into something different (I have plenty of curriculum ideas and material at the church).

Share: 8:15-8:30

Group Outreach Project
This brainstorm exercise should be completed within the next few meetings so that the group can perform the outreach before Christmas.

Ask people to throw out ideas, and write them on a whiteboard or poster board. DO NOT evaluate whether or not the idea is a good one, just write it down. Ask them to think outside the box. You can come back next week and evaluate which ideas make the most sense for the group. People will come up with better ideas if they know no one is going to judge it on the spot.

The only request I have, at this point, is that you focus their attention on personal type outreach (something that will touch people personally as opposed to impersonally).

Example: Instead of just collecting books for the local hospital waiting room, ask if you could host a story time when the room is full of anxious children waiting for a doctor’s visit. Instead of just raking leaves for the elderly, ask if you could throw a party and get to know them too.

Thanks for offering up your homes and/or hearts to give people a place to gather and live life together this week.

Vinnie C.

Secret Ingredients

Week Four-Secret Ingredients

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Tell us about a family secret recipe or favorite dish.

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

These are various translations of Rom. 12:12; I would pass one out to each person for them to read aloud. Ask them to quietly meditate on the verse. Ask them to open themselves up to the Lord in prayer.

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer,

King James Bible
Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;

Bible in Basic English
Being glad in hope, quiet in trouble, at all times given to prayer,

Douay-Rheims Bible
Rejoicing in hope. Patient in tribulation. Instant in prayer.

Darby Bible Translation
As regards hope, rejoicing: as regards tribulation, enduring: as regards prayer, persevering:

Weymouth New Testament
full of joyful hope, patient under persecution, earnest and persistent in prayer.

Young's Literal Translation
in the hope rejoicing; in the tribulation enduring; in the prayer persevering;

The Message
cheerfully expectant. Don't quit in hard times; pray all the harder.

New Living Translation
Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble, and always be prayerful.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

What are you the most hopeful about these days?

What encourages you in this hope?



What is the latest affliction/trouble you have endured?

What has helped you to patiently endure this trouble?


Thinking back on what you are most hopeful about and the troubles you have experienced recently, has prayer made a difference in these?

This discussion engendered great prayer time in the Sunday discussion group. At this point, you might ask people to pray for one another based on what they have heard thus far. Break up into smaller groups if you think it might help.


Develop: 8:00-8:15

Did group members invite others to join you for group this week? If so, what happened?

Is there someone who might be able to help you lead a small portion of the meeting next week?

Need help with refreshments? Ask for help!

Encourage the group to point out to each other when they see someone using a spiritual gift. Ask if anyone in the group would like to say something encouraging to someone else who has utilized their gift tonight.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Start thinking about outreach ideas the group can perform together before Christmas. Ask them to think about people they hope to lead to Christ and ways the group might be able to help that person.

To end the meeting, you could pray and ask God to lead your group in this regard.

In the coming weeks, I will ask you to lead the group in a brainstorming session on this topic (let me know if you think your group is ready for this now).

Living in Harmony

Week Three Living in Harmony

Connect: 7:00-7:20

§ Make sure everyone understands the covenant/guidelines for the group (last week you were to have created them).

§ Can you think of a time when you saw people who were “not on the same page” get “on the same page?” (from disharmony to harmony)

What made the biggest difference in this case?

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Humility seemed to be Paul’s answer for disharmony in the church.

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. (2 Chron. 7:14 KJV)

Read together Philippians 2:1-11

1 If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, 7 but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death-- even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (NIV)

We all want the kind of exaltation Jesus enjoyed, but few of us are interested in the humility that preceded it.

Open your hearts to God in prayer using this passage as a guide.

If anyone has a specific prayer request regarding something for which they need humility, the group can pray about that too.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

§ What about the premise of the message: “Sharing God’s peace with the world depends on our ability as Christians to be in harmony with one another?”

What scriptural support is there for or against this idea?

§ Romans 12:16 says “do not be proud.” This could be written “do not think the high thoughts.”

What “high thoughts” do you have about yourself that trip you up from time to time?

§ Philippians 2:6 says Jesus didn’t see equality with God as something to be grasped; this led to Him coming to earth as a man to save us. Jesus also did not grasp the kingdoms of the world when offered them by Satan.

What are you grasping for that may not be within God timing for you to have right now?

Are you holding on to something that you need to let go of?

§ Is there something in your life right now for which you need to eat some Humble Pie?

In what ways is putting on humility like putting on clothing (1Peter 5:5)?

What are some practical ways that we can cloth ourselves in humility this week?

§ Humility doesn’t mean you can’t set boundaries with people. Humility does mean letting people take advantage of you all the time. Talk about what should be done if people make it a pattern of taking advantage of your humility.
Develop: 8:00-8:15

Did group members invite others to join you for group this week? If so, what happened?

Is there someone in the group who shows initiative? Ask them to help you with a portion of the meeting next week.

If the group discussion was particular fruitful, you could have the group pray for each other about needs that arose during discussion or…

Let the group know you would like for them to pray for each other. Let the group know how much time you have set aside for this. Take requests (keep this moving along) and pray.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Ask the group to start thinking about outreach ideas the group can perform together before Christmas. Ask them to think about people they hope to lead to Christ and ways the group might be able to help that person.

To end the meeting, you could pray and ask God to lead your group in this regard.

Quick to Share

Week Two_Quick to Share

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Create the group covenant

“What values do you expect to be present in this group?” Or “What are some guidelines we will need to keep us on track?”

If the group gets stuck, here are some samples:

Clear purpose: to connect with one another, surrender ourselves to God, grow in application of God’s word, develop in our gifts, and share God’s love with outsiders.

Group attendance: to give priority to the group (call if I am absent or late).

Safe environment: to create a safe place where people can be heard and feel loved (no quick answers, snap judgments, or simple fixes).

Confidentiality: to keep sensitive information within the group.

Conflict: to avoid gossip and to immediately resolve concerns by following Matthew 18:15-17 which begins with going directly to the person with whom you have an issue.

Spiritual health: to give group members permission to help me live a healthy, balanced spiritual life pleasing to God.

Welcome newcomers: to invite our friends who might benefit from this group and warmly welcome newcomers.

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Read Luke 3:7-14

Verse 10 is the central question for the Christian life, “What should we do then?”

“As we pray to recognize the Lord’s presence here with us, let’s ask ourselves individually what God would have us do to ‘produce fruit in keeping with repentance’.” How does God want us to share with others?

Pray. You could break up into groups for this time or ask if someone else wants to lead the entire group in prayer.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

What benefits do you see to the biblical challenge to share with God's family first?

Does this seem unfair or out of balance?

John the Baptist had some angry words for his listeners in Luke 3:7-14. Review those words again and discuss together verse 10 (the central question of the Christian life).

How do you find John's answers to the various groups of people?

Personally, how do you see your relationship with the church?

As an opportunity to share with others or as an opportunity to receive? How might you become more balanced?

What ways can this Life Group share with a person or with people in need?
Help the group experience the scriptures!
What creative ways can you think of to share with & bless another person or family?

Develop: 8:00-8:15

If your group is small, you should challenge the members to help you reach out to others in the church who might benefit from the group. Many people will not engage with a group unless specifically asked to join.

Perhaps you could brainstorm about people the group could invite. You could pray for those people.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Let the group know that in the coming weeks you will spend time discussing and praying about how as a group you might reach out to those who are outside of God’s family.

Before Christmas, you could pray about your own outreach idea and either 1) implement it yourselves, 2) implement it with another small group or ministry, or 3) invite the whole church to help you.

To end the meeting, you could pray and ask God to lead your group in this regard.

Hating and Clinging

Preparing for Sampler
You should provide some food/refreshments for this first sampler meeting. Try to create a fun, party atmosphere.

Give people a chance to chat before the meeting, but start as close to 7:00 as you possibly can to set the tone for future weeks.

Connect: 7:00-7:20

Tell us about the place where you were born and something noteworthy about it. Keep your response to 1 or 2 minutes.

As the group leader, you go first to model how you want them to answer the question. Set the expectation that everyone is to share something.

Surrender: 7:20-7:30

Recap: On Sunday, Bruce spoke about hating evil and clinging to good (Romans 12:9).

Have someone read 1 Corinthians 14:20, “Brothers, stop thinking like children. In regard to evil be infants, but in your thinking be adults.”

Ask if someone would lead the group in prayer regarding the contents of this verse.

A prayer of surrender to be simple concerning evil and mature adults about that which is good. You might give people a chance to meditate on the verse before you pray.

If no one offers to pray, you can pray.

Grow: 7:30-8:00

Paul warned the Romans about teachers who did not have the Roman’s best spiritual interest in mind. He told them to stay away from these teachers. Then he applauded their obedience to the truth.

Ask someone to read Romans 16:19
Everyone has heard about your obedience, so I am full of joy over you; but I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil.

Let’s brainstorm together and get as many ideas out there as possible then we will come back and talk about some of them more in-depth. Try to involve everyone in this part of the discussion.

What are some things that should be part of our game plan of “becoming wise about what is good and innocent about what is evil?”

Example: applying Bible to our lives, praying against evil in our lives, spiritual disciplines like solitude, fasting, etc.

Let’s look at the list we came up with. Which do you see as most important for you? Why?

Bruce spoke about “potential evil.”
Food can be evil if you struggle with weight issues
Alcohol, if you struggle with restraint
Unfiltered computer for some people.

These things are not evil or wrong for everyone but may be wrong for you.

Can you think of other potential evils?

Develop: 8:00-8:15

Take some time here to explain how the group will be going forward.

Each week we will…

Take a few minutes to get to know each other better (connection).
Recognize the Lord’s presence in our meeting and surrender ourselves to him (via prayer, reading scripture, listening to a song, and other ideas you might come up with).
Discuss the message/scriptures we heard on the previous Sunday (we will do this for the next four weeks and decide as a group whether to continue this or choose another method for spiritual growth).

If you missed the Sunday message, you can download/listen to it on the website or check out pastor Vinnie’s weekly blog email for a recap of the message.

End the meeting after 90 minutes; if you want to stick around after we break that is fine.


On some weeks, we will…

Ask for people to take on more and more ownership of the group (bring snacks, help with various aspects of the group meetings, use your spiritual gifts, help champion a particular value in the group like fellowship, discipleship, ministry, outreach, worship)
Spend time discussing and praying about how as a group we might reach out to those who are outside of God’s family.

Before Christmas, we will come up with our own outreach idea and either 1) implement it ourselves, or 2) implement it with another small group or ministry, or 3) invite the whole church to help us.

This group will meet from now until mid-December. We will take a break during the holidays and decide before the holidays whether or not we would like to reassemble in January.

Next week, we will talk about what values we expect to be present in this group and draft a simple covenant to guide our group.

If you will be attending the group, let me know later tonight or before the next meeting. If you want to wait until after next week’s meeting before you commit to the group that is fine too.

Remind people where and when you are meeting next week. You might discuss if 7:00 pm is the best time to start. If so, remind them you aim to end at 8:30 so it is important for people to be there before 7:00 so that you can start on time.

Share: 8:15-8:30

Feel free to invite someone to join you next week.

If you still have time, you might break the group up into twos and threes and have them pray for each other.

Bruce talked about clinging to that which is good. The imagery for clinging to that which is good is that of pounding or joining one metal to another.

What good things has God brought into your life that you would like to cling to (patience, more family time, love for His word, etc)?

Tell someone in your small group about this and pray with them for a few minutes before we go.

If you can’t think of anything to share, take a moment and pray that this group will be a healthy one that bears fruit spiritually in our own lives and bears fruit in reaching out to outsiders.

Wounded LiSTeNeRs

LiSTeNeRs with Wounds

Connect:
Finish this sentence: You don’t know a person until…

Surrender:
Read Isaiah 53 and spend some time thanking God for the wounds His son endured for us. Perhaps people could silently thank God for the wounds they have endured b/c they are closer to God because of them. Or perhaps people could offer up their uncertainty about why bad things have happened to them.

1 Who has believed our message?
To whom has the Lord revealed his powerful arm?
2 My servant grew up in the Lord’s presence like a tender green shoot,
like a root in dry ground.
There was nothing beautiful or majestic about his appearance,
nothing to attract us to him.
3 He was despised and rejected—
a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.
We turned our backs on him and looked the other way.
He was despised, and we did not care.

4 Yet it was our weaknesses he carried;
it was our sorrows[a] that weighed him down.
And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God,
a punishment for his own sins!
5 But he was pierced for our rebellion,
crushed for our sins.
He was beaten so we could be whole.
He was whipped so we could be healed.
6 All of us, like sheep, have strayed away.
We have left God’s paths to follow our own.
Yet the Lord laid on him
the sins of us all.

7 He was oppressed and treated harshly,
yet he never said a word.
He was led like a lamb to the slaughter.
And as a sheep is silent before the shearers,
he did not open his mouth.
8 Unjustly condemned,
he was led away.[b]
No one cared that he died without descendants,
that his life was cut short in midstream.[c]
But he was struck down
for the rebellion of my people.
9 He had done no wrong
and had never deceived anyone.
But he was buried like a criminal;
he was put in a rich man’s grave.

10 But it was the Lord’s good plan to crush him
and cause him grief.
Yet when his life is made an offering for sin,
he will have many descendants.
He will enjoy a long life,
and the Lord’s good plan will prosper in his hands.
11 When he sees all that is accomplished by his anguish,
he will be satisfied.
And because of his experience,
my righteous servant will make it possible
for many to be counted righteous,
for he will bear all their sins.
12 I will give him the honors of a victorious soldier,
because he exposed himself to death.
He was counted among the rebels.
He bore the sins of many and interceded for rebels.

Grow:

Read 2 Corinthians 4:5-7
If we are like clay pots, what are some of the implications of that?

Have you ever considered yourself as wounded?

What part of your “woundedness” would you feel comfortable sharing with us all?

If God’s heart beats so for the wounded, why do we spend so much time “acting” as if we have it all together?

What do you think about this statement?
Your understanding of grace is in direct proportion to your own brokenness and need for God.

Read Luke 7:36-50. Does this passage validate the statement above? How does this thought relate to where you are right now spiritually speaking?

What weakness/brokenness do you think God wants to use within you to help you minister to others?

Are you being real with yourself about where you are spiritually?

Develop:
Blessing chair prayer for someone

Share:

Evaluate how the outreach event went.
§ What was perfect?
§ What could have been better?
§ What would you do different next time?
§ Does the group want to try something similar this summer?
§ How can we pray/followup on the people who came?

Remember, the pools will be opened soon! The group is welcomed to use the pool for outreach/fellowship events.

LiSTeNeRs Through the Seasons

LiSTeNeRs through the Seasons

Connect: What is your favorite season? Why?

Surrender:

Use this song lyric as a prayer or to inspire a surrender prayer from the group.

Great is thy faithfulness
Oh God my father
There is no shadow of turning with thee
Thou changest not
Thy compassions they fail not
As thou hast been
Thou forever will be

Summer and Winter
Springtime and harvest
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above
Join in all nature in manifold witness
To thy great faithfulness
Mercy and love

Great is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness
Lord unto me

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thy own dear presence to cheer and to guide
Your strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow
Blessings all mine with ten thousand aside

Grow:

Any thoughts from Sunday’s message on spiritual seasons?

Spring: preparation, freshness, focus, beginnings, planting, activity, breaking up the ground.

Summer: fullness, gifts to the max, weeding, watering.

Fall: reaping either good or bad, hard work pays off, storing.

Winters: Where is God? What has happened? Hopeful expectation, forced rest, living off what is stored.

What season do you see yourself in right now?

Several ways to get into a season…
In a season of your own doing (sinning, making bad choices into a winter, or following into a summer time). Can you think of biblical characters or Bible verses to back this up?

In a season because God has placed you there. Can you think of a biblical characters or Bible verses to back this up?

Sometimes it is hard to endure a long season while you are longing for another. Have you found yourself (along with Bruce) wanting to force the seasons on God?

Read Psalm 86:11
What do you think an undivided heart looks like in everyday life?

Read John 14:31
Bruce called this the secret to surviving spiritual seasons. Develop the ideas in this verse together.

Develop:
If you think someone has potential to start an outreach type discussion group this summer, take a moment to tell them so. You might help them develop some ideas for a group. Perhaps your group could sponsor an outreach type group or servant evangelism type project (where you find a need in the community and meet it).

Share: Did your group choose an outreach activity yet? Do you need help? Contact me.

the Power of a name

The power of a name

Connect:

§ Do you know what your name means?

§ If not, do you know how your parents chose your name?

§ If not, what are some nicknames you have been given over the years?

Surrender: In Revelation alone, Jesus is given 17 different names. Each of us can read one and remember our Lord. If someone feels led to pray something between names, they should feel free to, though it isn’t necessary.

The faithful witness, first to rise from the dead, commander of all the rulers of the world, son of man, first and last, living one who died, son of God, Lion of the tribe of Judah, lamb, shepherd, faithful and true, word of God, King of kings and Lord of Lords, the Alpha and Omega, Beginning and End, root of David, bright and morning star.

By Faith we believe that Jesus is living up to and will live up to each of these names. By this same faith, we believe that we can live up to our individual names.

Grow:

What does it mean to you that you might receive a new name in heaven?

Read 1 Corinthians 4:15. Talk about the difference between a guardian (teacher) and a spiritual parent. How are these lived out in the family of the church?

As a generation passes off the scene of our church, what responsibility do you feel to “fill the gaps” that are left behind? In what area of ministry do you feel your gifts are best used?

In 1 Corinthians 4:16, Paul urged the people to imitate him as their spiritual father. The idea was that they should become spiritual fathers to others. What does that ministry look like today? How do you see this ideal being worked out in your life?

Is there someone in the church that you might come alongside and “mentor?”

Is there someone outside the church that you might “mentor?”

How do you feel about these two ideas?

Develop:

Talk about when/if the group will end for the summer.

You might ask for specific feedback on what you can do as a leader to make the group better next time around.

Blessing chair or prayer: you might offer the blessing chair to someone tonight or you might spend some extra time in prayer tonight (since there are less discussion questions than normal).

Perhaps someone in your group might be developed to organize an outreach type group this summer…

My wife is doing a “For Women Only” group either at a local bookstore. The idea is women from our church inviting pre-Christian women to join them for this study.

There are lots of other ideas out there already:

Science and the Bible discussion, knitting group, book club, etc. Anything that interests pre-Christians can become an opportunity for us to reach them with the good news. See if anyone in your LIFE Group is interested in starting one of these type groups. I will help them.

This past week, one of the LIFE groups generated two ideas on this: 1) on person wants to organize to serve the homeless, 2) another wants to host a backyard picnic.

Share:

It is time to get the LIFE group outreach events on the calendar.

· Push your group to evaluate your options, choose one, and then choose a date.
· Remember to think relationally (How will this help us connect relationally with pre-Christians?).
· Invite pre-Christians to join you. Example: we ministered to an elderly woman who recently attempted suicide. We invited her neighbors to join us in doing some work around her house and playing Scrabble with her. We were able to share Christ’s love with her neighbors too.
· One group is talking about doing something for the upcoming “Concerts on the Green” series in Framingham. They may give out free water or setup a prayer booth.

Parent LiSTeNeRs

Parent LiSTeNeRs

Connect: What stands out the most about the way your parents/guardians raised you?

Surrender: Share a characteristic or attribute of God for which you are thankful (holiness, all knowing, all powerful, etc.)

Think about what it means that God is called our Father.

Use this prayer as a springboard or
Each person can read a line or
You can recite it together

Our Father, Who art in heaven,
Hallowed be Thy Name.
Thy Kingdom come.
Thy Will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil. Amen.

Grow:

The extremes in parenting are the authoritarian parent and the lenient parent. Do/did you tend toward one of these?

Ephesians 6:4 advises parents to “bring them (children) up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. What is the difference between discipline and instruction?

Do/did your children ever drive a wedge between you and your spouse by playing you against each other (“Mom said I could stay out until 11 pm”)? What do you do about this?

Let’s compare notes. What is the best way you have found to exasperate/irritate your children (Eph. 6:4)? How are you growing through this issue?
In the Ten Commandments, we are challenged to “Honor our fathers and mothers.” How do you obey this command when your parents are not Christians or continually hurt you?
Why do you suppose God attached a promise (long life) to the command to obey our fathers and mothers?
In 1Samuel 12:29, Eli was honoring his sons more than God. Bruce called this Kid Worship. Do you think this is a problem today? Have you seen yourself falling into this trap?

For those who do not have children: You have an opportunity (like the Apostle Paul) to spiritually father or mother people in the family that is our church. What are your thoughts on this?

Develop:

Talk about when/if the group will end for the summer.

You might ask for specific feedback on what you can do as a leader to make the group better next time around.

Share:

It is time to get the outreach events on the calendar.

· Push your group to evaluate your options and choose one.
· Remember to think relationally (How will this help us connect relationally with pre-Christians?).
· Invite pre-Christians to join you. Example: we ministered this weekend to an elderly woman who recently attempted suicide. We invited her neighbors to join us in doing some work around her house and playing Scrabble with her. We were able to share Christ’s love with her neighbors too.
· One group is hosting a pizza/game night at the church on a Saturday night. They will all invite pre-Christians t o join them.

This summer is a chance for us to get out into the fields and plant some gospel seed. My wife is planning on doing a “For Women Only” group either at a local bookstore or at the church poolside. The idea is for four women from our church to find four pre-Christian women to join them for this study.

There are lots of other ideas out there:

Science and the Bible discussion, knitting group, book club, etc. Anything that interests pre-Christians can become an opportunity for us to reach them with the good news. See if anyone in your LIFE Group is interested in starting one of these type groups. I will help them.

Single LiSTeNeRs

Connect: Share something that you enjoyed doing when you were single. If single, what do you enjoy doing now?

Surrender: Prayer for Singles. Each person could read a paragraph while the others listen for their own spiritual benefit or to use it as a guide to pray for singles they know.

I am God, you must know that I love you. I even sent my only son to die for you. You must know that I will never forsake you and I will never leave you alone. I will be with you always, even when you fail to return my affection I am patient with you.

I know that you long to give yourself to another person and have a deeply intimate relationship with them. You have wanted for some time to be loved thoroughly, exclusively, and unconditionally by another person. Please know that I want you to have your heart’s desire but right now I am asking you to wait.

Wait until you are satisfied with being loved by me alone, for I am a jealous God and I must know that you will have no other gods before me. Wait until you can find fulfillment in an intensely personal and unique relationship with me alone. Wait until you can be content with the knowledge that only in me is your satisfaction to be found. When you are ready, I have planned the perfect relationship for you. However, you are not ready for another relationship until you are committed to me exclusive of anyone or anything else, even your most secret desires and longings.

My beloved, I want you to have the best. Don't become discouraged, just keep expecting great things. Keep listening to me and talking with me. Keep learning the things that I'm trying to teach you. You just wait. Don't you be anxious, don't worry, don't even look at what others have or what I've given them. Don't become distracted by the things you think you want. Just keep looking ahead and up to Me, or you may miss what I want to show you.

When you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any you would have dreamed of. You see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready, your union cannot perfectly reflect my love for you. When both of you are ready I will unite you with my blessing and your union will more perfectly reflect our relationship.

Know that I am God, and I love you. ---- Author Unknown

Grow: Here are a bunch of questions; pick a handful to work through with the group.

How did God speak to you this past Sunday?

Had you ever thought of singleness as a gift from God?
Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:8 , “Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. Can you think of reasons why it would be good for people to stay unmarried?

1 Corinthians 7:17 & 20 says to retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to you and to which God has called you. What does that say to you about your work situation, family situation, your church situation or any other situation?

For singles: What would it look like for you to accept singleness as a gift from God?

Romans 8:28
In all things God works for the good of those who love him. What does mean to you today?

The goal of marriage should be Christ-like-ness not happiness. Happiness is an outcome of a marriage where both spouses are becoming more like Christ. Do you believe this? Why or why not?

How is the greener grass syndrome affecting you today?

1 Corinthians 7:28 says, “Those who marry will face many troubles in this life and I want to spare you this.” What do you think of Paul’s premarital counseling approach?

If you are always looking at the other side of the fence, you will never enjoy what’s on your side. Any comments on this?

Develop:

Discuss if your group will take a break for the summer and how/when that will happen.

This is a good week to begin asking for feedback from the group on what has been helpful and what has not been helpful in the past weeks of LIFE Group.

Share:

It is time to get the outreach events on the calendar.

• Push your group to evaluate your options and choose one.
• Remember to think relationally (How will this help us connect relationally with pre-Christians?).
• Invite pre-Christians to join you. Example: we ministered this weekend to an elderly woman who recently attempted suicide. We invited her neighbors to join us in doing some work around her house and playing Scrabble with her. We were able to share Christ’s love with her neighbors too.

OutREACH ideas?

Idea from the Sunday group: For the people who can’t come to church, we will take the church to them. Someone in our group knows and witnesses to a shut-in. Some of us will go and clean up the yard/house, while others play games and build a relationship with the person. We will attempt to help others this way too.

Idea from the Thursday group: Host a neighborhood block party at someone’s house; invite people from the Divorce Care ministry to join us.

Disciplined LiSTeNeRs in Marriage

Connect: In one minute or less, tell us about a marriage that has influenced you greatly (either positively or negatively).

Surrender: Break up into groups to pray for the marriages in our church that they might be strong like triple-braided cords. Husbands and wives could pray together. Couples could pray for one another. Single people could pray for married people they know. ETC.

(Remind people of how much time you have set aside for this).

Grow:

Do you think marriage is in crisis in our society? Why or why not?

For you, what is the hardest part of weaving the spiritual into your marriage relationship?

Read Ecclesiastes 4:7-12
Ask the singles in the group if anything stood out to them (about marriage or relationship in general) from the passage on Sunday.

Ask the married people which word picture stuck out to them the most.

Work v. 9
Walk v. 10
Warmth v.11
War v.12

One verse 9,

Practically speaking, what do you think it means for husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church?

It is easy for you to ask for help when you are overloaded? If not, why not?

On a scale of 1-10, how easy is it to recognize when your spouse is overloaded? How can we be more attentive to our spouse’s overload?

On verse 10,

Read Galatians 6:1. What do you think Galatians 6:1 would like in a marriage relationship?

On verse 11,

Why do you suppose God specifically tells husbands to love their wives and wives to submit/honor/respect their husbands?

Men tend to value respect over love. Women tend to value love over respect. In your experience, have you found this to be true?
What have you learned about living out these principles of love and respect?

On verse 12,

The world’s system works against marriages in many ways. Which one concerns you the most?

If you were the Devil, what would you do to unravel Christian marriages?

What are some ways that you have found to weave Jesus into your marriage relationship?

Thoughts:

Pick several; of questions that you think will best meet the needs in your group. Start with simpler questions and work toward the more difficult ones.

Do not let the single people sit this one out. If they don’t answer the questions, reframe the question specifically for them. They might not be married, but as objective observers they must have some ideas on it.

Develop:

Should you try the blessing chair this week? This is a great way for people to learn to exercise their spiritual gifts (through prayer).

Last week, I tried the blessing chair (put someone in a chair and have the group lay hands on and pray for God’s blessing). It took awhile for the group to decide who should be in the chair, but I am glad I waited the group out, b/c the person who ended up there really needed focused prayer from the group.

Share:

How are the outreach ideas coming? Both of my groups have ideas and we are working on them, but we don’t have dates settled yet. This is the week to start firming up those plans. If you run out of time, perhaps some people would stay after and work on the outreach stuff with you?

Disciplined LiSTeNeRs

Connect: Tell us about a time in your life when you were the most disciplined in a certain area of your life. Example: When I played b-ball in high school, I went to the park late at night to practice while other kids were sleeping.

Surrender: Psalm 141: a prayer for discipline and protection. You could have each person read a verse and mediate for a 15 seconds on each verse (play some background music if you want).

1 A psalm of David. O LORD, I am calling to you. Please hurry! Listen when I cry to you for help!
2 Accept my prayer as incense offered to you, and my upraised hands as an evening offering.
3 Take control of what I say, O LORD, and keep my lips sealed.
4 Don't let me lust for evil things; don't let me participate in acts of wickedness. Don't let me share in the delicacies of those who do evil.
5 Let the godly strike me! It will be a kindness! If they reprove me, it is soothing medicine. Don't let me refuse it. But I am in constant prayer against the wicked and their deeds.
6 When their leaders are thrown down from a cliff, they will listen to my words and find them pleasing.
7 Even as a farmer breaks up the soil and brings up rocks, so the bones of the wicked will be scattered without a decent burial.
8 I look to you for help, O Sovereign LORD. You are my refuge; don't let them kill me.
9 Keep me out of the traps they have set for me, out of the snares of those who do evil.
10 Let the wicked fall into their own snares, but let me escape.

Grow:
1. In what ways is discipline implied in being "Living Sacrifices", "Transformed", "Not Conforming" and "Renewed"? 2. Read aloud 1 Corinthians 9:25-27. Discuss together what this discipline might look like in our lives.

What difference would it make in our church?

How do these verses challenge us regarding our perspective toward discipline?

3. In what ways were individuals challenged regarding the "2 Secrets of Learning Discipline"? (1. Start where you are 2. Don't avoid community)?

What other "secrets" have people found helpful in learning to discipline themselves?

I broke the group up into smaller groups for this next question…

4. How might we come alongside one another, like the coach in the film clip, and challenge each other to become all that God has desired for us to be?

Develop:
Do you need help with anything in your group? Ask someone to help.

Ask the guys if they plan to attend Men’s Fellowship on Saturday 7:30-9:30am. Perhaps the guys in your group could encourage each other to attend and sit together during this.

Share:
This is the week that you should begin shaping your outREACH ideas. If you didn't brainstorm last week, make sure to leave plenty of time (10 minutes) for this at the end. If you did the brainstorm thing last week, this is the week to evaluate the ideas you had and pick one or more to begin working on.

Before you brainstorm, you may want to have some ideas of your own (search the Internet for “evangelism ideas” or “servant evangelism” ideas). One of my groups had a hard time and I had to prompt them with ideas.

Pick the one that is the best fit for the group.

Pick the one that will make the biggest impact for Christ.

Think relational (there needs to be a relational component to outREACH). The idea to build relationships that could one day include God’s redemptive work in someone’s life.

Think community transformation (how could we make a difference that will impact our community?).

Whatever your idea--double it! Then ask God what it would take for your group to accomplish it. It might mean engaging others (who haven't gotten connected to a LIFE group or people outside the church) to help you. These are the type of things that can lead us toward community transformation. Think outside the box.

Start planning the outREACH for late May early June.

Check with the church office to make sure you don't schedule the outREACH during another church event.

LiSTeNeRs w/ Time

If there are new people, you might want to review the covenant.

7:00-7:20
Connect: Can you think of an instance where the value of time was known to you? Or how have you come to view the idea of “time?”

Example: As a teen, I turned the clocks back an hour b/c I didn’t like my curfew time and wanted an extra hour.

Perhaps others will have stories about something taking a long time or short time. Stories about a watch or other time piece, stories about daylight savings, time zone changes, being on time or late.

This produced great discussion in Sunday’s group with people sharing what time means to them and reflecting back in life on why they view time the way they do.

7:20-7:35
Surrender: In John 11:1-7, Jesus was confronted with a crisis (death of Lazarus). What situations are you currently dealing with that need to be viewed as opportunities for "God's Son [to] be glorified through it" (v. 5)?

After hearing people’s concerns, this is a good time to break up into groups and pray for one another inviting God into these situations and the group meeting.

7:35-8:05
Grow:

1. After listening again to the story of Jesus and Lazarus in John 11:1-7, what differences do you see in the way you respond to "crisis" situations and the way Jesus responded?

2. Go around the room and discuss how people in your group deal with the time constraints on their lives?

How are people doing in "standing out" from the world around them regarding their use of time?

3. When Jesus invited His followers to "Come with [Him] by themselves to a quiet place and get some rest" (Mk 6:31) -- how do you respond to His invitation to the same in your life today?

Which is the hardest for you…
Being alone?
Being quiet?
Or resting?

How can this situation be confronted?

4. God commands us to a Sabbath rest (on of the 10 "commandments"). Why is this one commandment so easy to ignore?

How might we re-capture God's heart for the Sabbath in our lives? (Discuss practical things here -- not fluffy, ideas).

5. How does 1 Peter 4:4-5 challenge you regarding the way you use the time God has given you?

8:05-8:15
Develop/Share:

Are there elements of the meeting you would like to delegate?

Has someone in the group been blessed by someone else? Ask them to share this.

OUTREACH PROJECT
This would be a good week to begin a brainstorming session on what your group could do to reach out together.

The only request I have, at this point, is that you focus their attention on personal type outreach (something that will touch people personally as opposed to impersonally).

Example: Instead of just collecting books for the local hospital waiting room, ask if you could host a story time when the room is full of anxious children waiting for a doctor’s visit. Instead of just raking leaves for the elderly, ask if you could throw a party for them too.

Brainstorming: Ask people to throw out ideas, and write them on a whiteboard or poster board. DO NOT evaluate whether or not the idea is a good one, just write it down. Ask them to think outside the box. You can come back next week and evaluate which ideas make the most sense for the group. People will come up with better ideas if they know no one is going to judge it on the spot.

If you don’t have time to do the brainstorming, you can do it next week. But time is running out (we only have around 5 weeks left).

LiSTeNeRs w/ Money

Great work last week. We had over 60 people in LIFE Groups.

Here is a suggested order for our meetings this week. I used these questions (written by Bruce) with the group on Sunday and they generated great discussion. If you come up with some creative ideas, comment here on the blog so that we all can benefit from your ideas.

Suggested LIFE Group Leader meetings: Sunday 5/6 @ 3pm and Sunday 6/3 @ 3pm. Let me know if those will work for you. They will be around 90 minutes long.

7:00-7:20
Connect: We only have 15 minutes set aside for this portion, so in less than a minute, tell us about one of your earliest experiences with money/possessions or the lack thereof.

7:20-7:30
Surrender:
Read over Luke 12:16-21 together as a group. Ask the group to pray out loud about ways we can break the hold that money has on us. And ways in which we can be rich toward God…
rich toward God in our marriages,
rich toward God in our perspective toward work,
rich toward sharing our faith, etc.
(You can break up into groups for this if you think it appropriate)

7:30-8:10
Grow:

Remember: anyone of these questions could generate great discipleship discussion, so don’t be alarmed if you don’t get to all of them. Choose the ones you feel are best suited for your group.

1. A recent national survey found…

• materialism,
• balance of work and family,
• and financial pressures are among the top issues confronting Christians today.

Are any (or all) of these true for you?

Would you add any other issue to the list pertaining to money/possessions?

2. Knowing that Jesus talked about money more than any other part of our lives and knowing some of His admonitions regarding its use…

• where your treasure is, there your heart will be
• it is hard for a rich [person] to enter Heaven
• You can't serve both God and money etc...,

how does your life come in line with God's perspective?


3. Discuss together circumstances when people find themselves tempted to think "more money would fix everything".

As a LiSTeNeR, what are some practical steps we can take to battle the temptation to believe this?

Or how might we help one another with this?

4. In Luke 12:16-21 why, specifically, does God call this "rich man" a "fool"?

What are some of the thoughts and practical applications that people in this group have received regarding what it means to be "rich toward God"?

5. Based on the different N.T. stories told about how 1st century Christians viewed their possessions (see 2 Cor 8:2-4 or Acts 2:42-46) how do different people in your group go about deciding how much of their income is set aside for God's work?

Are there ways in which anyone's thinking has been challenged in this area?

8:10-8:15
Develop:
One group created a group roster last week by passing around a sheet of paper and asking people to put their contact info on it. Someone will type it up and give it out at group this week. People can contact each other for prayer and get-to-gethers during the week.

You may have a sense that someone in the group would be able to help with a certain component (connect, surrender, grow) next week. This would be a good time to ask them.

8:15-8:30
Share:
Break up into groups of 2-3. Have them pray about people with whom they would like to share their faith. Pray that God would reveal an outreach type event for the group to do.

Bridging the gap between faith & footsteps

Last week, I noticed people's tendency to depersonalize the questions we asked them. We asked them what resonated with them in the passage and most people answered the question without answering it. They talked about the passage, but didn't really answer the question. It is much easier to talk about the passage then to let the passage talk to us. Please gently nudge people away from depersonalization and toward answering the question. One way to do this is to give people hooks. Examples: does the downcast faces of the disciples resonate with you? Does the fact that Jesus didn't reveal Himself at first resonate with you? Does the trip back to Jerusalem to tell the good news resonate with you?

There are three levels of bible study 1. what does it say? 2. what does it mean? (Bruce does a great job of covering these for us) and 3. what is God saying to me (this is where we ought to spend most of our time). If we allow the group to depersonalize every question, we will never get to the third level, which is the goal of our groups.

7:00-7:25
Connection: Create a covenant. What do you value in a small group experience? What boundaries would you suggest we adopt as a group for the next 8 weeks? (if you want to warm up to this question, you could ask people to share one of the first Christian small group experiences they can recall).

7:25-7:35
Surrender:
Read over Romans 12:1-2 together as a group. If you have different Bible translations available, read from 2 or 3 different translations. As you listen to these words once again, what thoughts or questions come to your mind about Paul's challenge? Invite God to do His will with your group.

7:35-8:10
Grow:
1. If it is true for you that "you are the most attentive to God when you are the most desperate", what does it say about "trials" and "difficult times" in our lives?

2. As we strive to put "footsteps to our faith", what sort of inspiration (if any) do you draw from God's promise of rewards (eg. Jer. 17:10; 1 Cor 4:5 etc...)?

Warning: some people may ask if Jer. 17:10 is suggesting a works salvation. This verse confused a couple of people in the Sunday group. You could explain the different between works for salvation (which won't work) and works as a result of the fact that we are saved (which does work).

3. Which element of the Christian life do you find yourself having the greatest trouble with....

• Preparing for Installation (being honest in our self-evaluation)
• Removing old components (letting go of the "junk" from our past)
• Installing power source (living in the power of the Spirit)
• Mounting securely (living in faith that your salvation is secure)
• Customize (knowing and practicing your unique spiritual gift)
• Troubleshooting (knowing and relying on God's network of support for us in the event of trouble - eg. Scripture, spiritual friends, etc...)

5. Most Christians really want to "know God's will" for their lives. What do you think the difference might be between "knowing it" and "testing and approving" it (Rom 12:2)?

8:10-820 Develop: You could ask if anyone wants to say something encouraging about someone else. You could enlist people to help with various components (food, fun, outreach project).

8:20-8:30 Share: This might be a good time to introduce the idea of an outreach project/event and pray for God to open your eyes to the needs of people around you that you could meet. This is a good time to subgroup. In the coming weeks, I will suggest a brainstorming session for your group on this outreach event thing.

Surprised by the Savior

1^st week * 4.9.07 * Surprised by the Savior

7:00-7:20

Connect: Tell us your name and a time when you were really surprised by something. You answer the question first to model that sharing should be kept to a paragraph or two.

7:20-7:25

Surrender: To encourage self reflection, try Ignatius’contemplation. Through Ignatius’ contemplation, you put yourself into the story. Have someone read Luke 24:13-35, and direct the group to, “Imagine you are a disciple walking the road to Emmaus. You are barefooted. You are tired. The events of the last few days have filled you with emotion. What are you thinking? What are you feeling? What of the disciples’ experience most resonates with you?

7:25-8:05

Grow: What of the disciples’ experience most resonates with you? You could stay here for most of the time, but in case you need more ideas…

• Cleopas and the other man (t.o.m.) didn’t recognize Jesus at first. Have you (or someone close to you) had an experience lately where Jesus was present but you didn’t recognize it at first?

• Why do you suppose these disciples were kept from recognizing Christ at first?

• Cloepas & t.o.m. “had hoped” that Jesus would redeem Israel by military might, but God’s plan was to redeem the entire world through the death of Christ. When you first came to Jesus, what unrealistic expectations did you have? Do you have any today?

• What parts of your backstory (life story) might be overwhelming your ability to understand the things that Jesus wants to teach you today? Examples: sinful patterns, pain, hurt, grief, family of origin, etc.

• Is there a part of your backstory (way back or recent) that you have not taken the time to process with Jesus? Remember, Jesus can handle your backstory.
  

• Cleopas & t.o.m. traveled back 7 miles to share the “good news” that Jesus was alive. If you were one of these disciples, to whom would you be traveling back to share the news?

8:05-8:15

Explain how a typical LIFE Group will run:

• connection (icebreaker),

• surrender (slow down and focus on God),

• grow (discussion time reflecting on scripture/sermon application from previous Sunday)

• develop (time of encouragement, involving them in the process, finding ways to serve each other and the church)

• share (praying for and strategizing about how to reach our friends with the message of the good news). Each group will organize an outreach type event during the 8 weeks.

Explain that the group will meet next week to create a covenant and will meet for 8 weeks and then recovenant as to how the group wants to interact during the summer months.

8:15-8:30

Housekeeping stuff (where are we meeting next week, who is bringing refreshments/meal, etc.). Ask people to let you know after the meeting whether or not they would like to join the group for the next 8 weeks.

Remind the ladies of the progressive dinner on Saturday from 4-8 (still time to sign up; call church office).

Homework: for those who plan to come back next week, ask them “What values do you expect to be present in the group?” You will use their answers next week to create a covenant. Examples: honesty, caring, acceptance, fun, etc.

For group leaders only…

What is your favorite alternate title to Sunday’s message?

• A walk with two regular Joes

• Holy Heartburn

• Jesus reports, you decide

• Fully “getting” Easter (as in understanding the real meaning).